During the 2020’s, a
company called Maranada Incorporated purchased religion. They developed a market-savvy,
"experience"-based model that provided a user sensitive, theme-park
atmosphere. Their broadcast ministry was setup in Las Vegas - mostly because
that was where the showgirls could be found.
The word “church” was
replaced with the more inclusive word "mall". New "worship
taxes" were instituted across most of the developed world such that, by
2042, people could not afford to congregate anywhere but in Maranada approved
malls, as “worship” in these centers was also classified as “shopping”.
Some historians believe
that this all happened because the Boomers wanted to see euthanasia legalized
and "fanatically" religious people kept getting in the way. Between 2018 and 2025, (before the institution
of the tax breaks for taking care of the Boomers' parents and the discovery of
the little red miracle pill), there
was a growing movement that forced the US Congress to pass a law permitting
euthanasia of old, sick and dying people who could sign wavers. Most of this pressure was coming from Boomers
who were paying entire inheritances to the medical profession to cover the cost
of endlessly prolonging the lives of their mothers and fathers.
A designer drug was
developed that made Boomers’ parents more than happy to sign the waver.
In order to quickly
facilitate the painless demise of the Boomers' parents, a man named Anton
Guilliame invented the previously mentioned "HyperGuillotine". The hyperguillotine was a laser surgical
instrument that removed the patient's head instantly while simultaneously
cauterizing the wound, making the process appear painless and bloodless.
Anton Guilliame perfected
the hyperguillotine in 2024, but it wasn't until he released the more portable
version, which he called the HyperUltraGuillotine, or HUG for short, that sales
really took off. Of course, this brought
an entirely new meaning to the words "give me a hug" when Boomers
visited their parents in nursing homes.
In fact, the elderly tended to say, "For God's sake, don't give me
a hug!" And then they'd laugh and
their Boomer children would laugh too.
Of course, even though
the Boomers had clamored for legalized euthanasia a decade before, they
nevertheless used their incredible voting power to stop the process in the
elections of 2032, because they began to realize that they were aging into
"the guillotine years". In
fact, "The Guillotine Years" was a popular dramatic series from 2039
to 2041.
As a consequence of all this, there were
thousands of HUGs stored away, unused, all over the world in 2045.
Jules had a lot of trouble completing the link-up for Portia. It wasn't that he couldn't make it work
technically; it's just that the party to whom she was calling had no SPECTACL
of her own.
"Is this Keeko?" asked Portia.
"Yes," said Keeko, the oldest super-chimp and the mother of
all the other super-chimps; all caged in Houston. "How did you know to find me at this
link?"
"This is Portia Summers," said Portia because the chat was
audio only.
"Hello, Portia," said Keeko.
"God bless you for thinking of me."
Keeko, the super-chimp, had lived in a cage all her life. Each day the paper that covered the cage
floor was changed out. Keeko was more
than intelligent enough to be potty-trained, in fact she could pick the lock of
her cage and use the computer, but if she did not poop and pee all over the
floor, her papers wouldn't be changed out.
During the Twenty-thirties, when Keeko was in her formative years, the
Maranada Corporation had been systematically recycling or reusing all the old
assets they picked up from their various acquisitions, and they managed to
discard large quantities of books by giving them to their next door neighbor -
Space Traffic Control. Consequently,
Space Traffic Control saved on litter.
They shredded Bibles by the truckload and used them for animal cage
litter in all their experimental labs.
Together with her children, Keeko had managed to glue back together
two entire Bibles. It had taken a
tremendous amount of patience, and had to be done totally on the q.t. as their
STC masters might have taken the hidden Bibles away.
In her first weeks at STC, Portia happened to find the huge, glued
together masses that the monkey's had reconstructed. She was amazed at the precision and patience
they'd taken to remake them and Portia returned them to their hiding
places. Once she got to know Keeko, she
realized that Keeko was a fragile and empathetic spirit who wanted only to love
and be loved.
"Keeko," said Portia.
"I need some advice on morality -- some spiritual advice if you
will."
"Oh, well then," said Keeko.
"I don't know if I'm worthy of such a complement. I'm just an old furbag, you know."
"Oh, stop it," laughed Portia. "You're the most knowledgeable person I
know on the subject."
"Thank you," said Keeko.
"What?" asked Portia.
"For calling me a 'person'," said Keeko.
Portia smiled. She knew that
Keeko could get out of her cage; surf the 'Net; use the desklink on the
keeper's table; theorize new knowledge in quantum mechanics. Both Keeko and Portia knew that Keeko was not
right for space travel and that she and her children were destined for
destruction if Portia didn't keep the program going -- somehow.
The rest of the Waste-REL crew listened closely to the conversation
but Lyle stayed in the background, sitting by himself. No one was consulting him but that was
okay. He didn't want to explain his
intentions.
"Listen, Keeko," said Portia. "I'm in space right now, on the
Waste-REL."
"I'm so sorry about that," said Keeko. "I know that I was supposed to be the
one…"
"Forget it," said Portia.
"That's not important now. I
need advice. We've had a first contact,
with an actual alien -- well not an alien, his computer -- but the point is, he
told us we have to…" Portia
stopped, she turned to the Jules displayed on the far wall. "Is this link secure?"
"Utterly," said Jules.
"It's so encrypted, I
can't hear it." Jules smiled.
"Listen, Keeko," continued Portia. "The alien-being told us we have to… he
gave us a tool with which to kill the Boomers and then told us to use it."
"Oh, no - no," gasped Keeko.
"How awful."
"Yes," said Portia.
"I'm afraid that there's no getting around it either. I think if we don't do it, our whole species
will be destroyed." Portia then had
a sudden thought. "Oh, I don't know
if that includes you or not?"
"That doesn't matter to me," said Keeko. "This is most terrible. How could this be?"
Portia explained about the risk to the planet and the need to move
quickly and the Boomers' intransigence.
"You cannot do this," said Keeko. "It is against God's law."
"But genocide has been a political tool since history
began," said Portia. "Is there
no way we can find some kind of moral ground upon which to do this? Self-preservation? Our responsibility to the planet? Something?"
"No," said Keeko, despite knowing that the loss of Portia
would mean her own destruction and that of her children. "You must turn your craft and send it
into the sun. You must destroy
yourselves before this thing can murder so many millions of people."
"That's what I thought," said Donny. "That's what I've been thinking ever
since we went through the fuzzynavel again."
"Me too," said Ayame, with a strained smile and a hug for
her sweet new love.
"She's right," said Verna.
"Mm hmm," agreed Mickey.
"All right," said Portia.
"Then we'll have to destroy the ship, Jules."
"I can't" said Jules.
"Asimov's rules -- sorry."
"Well," laughed Mickey.
"If we just stop fixing stuff long enough it'll happen
anyway."
"I wanted to say that but I'm not allowed to," said
Jules. "Sorry."
"Wait," interrupted Lyle.
"You don't have to do this."
"What do you mean," said Portia.
"I already know that it's going to be all right," said Lyle.
"How do you know?"
"The aliens, they can talk to me through the garment," said
Lyle. "They told me that it was my
decision."
There was a lull. They groked
it. Suddenly Lyle seemed to have a lot
too much power.
"What are you saying, Lyle?" asked Portia.
Lyle gently pushed Portia aside and addressed the communications
console.
"Keeko," said Lyle.
"This is Lyle Green."
"Yes, Lyle?" said Keeko.
"I was the one chosen to wear the robe," said Lyle. "I was given the choice."
"Yes," said Keeko.
"So, I've made my choice," said Lyle.
"I understand," said Keeko.
"God be with you."
"Thank you," said Lyle, though he had no idea what she
meant.
"Understand what?" asked Donny.
"Portia," said Keeko on the Waste-REL's speaker. "I trust Lyle Green. I believe him when he says that everything is
going to be okay. Be at peace."
"What the helix is she talking about?" said Verna. "What peace? We're going to kill millions of people."
"No we're not," said Lyle, sidling up to Verna and hugging
her around the waist. "I promise
we're not, okay? Keeko believes me. Can you believe in me too?"
"You know I do, baby," said Verna, rubbing his nose.
"No one is going to be killed?" asked Donny.
"No one?" asked Mickey.
"What she said," said Lyle, referring to the communications
console. "Be at peace." Lyle smiled.
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